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[16 Nov 2006|07:55pm] |
i know some things are out of my control
but it just seems like one thing happends after another
am i ever going to get a break from all of this
or is this just how life is.
game.over.
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[11 Oct 2006|09:54pm] |
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i think i have kept shit locked up for way too long. when shit happens i tend to put it aside, try to forget about it so i dont have to deal with it. iv done that with way too many things over the past year. i feel like im about to burst. im never straight forward from day one. i let people walk all over me and just pretend like everythings fine and dandy. well you know what its not. you dont know shit about me. im tired of everything. something needs to change.
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| summmmaaaa time |
[26 May 2006|08:47am] |
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im not really sure why it took me so long to realize that your just not the one for me. i cant change you and we just dont fit. its a hard concept.....letting go. but it is for the best. and im kind of excited for once to see where being single takes me. shiiit its the summer time and the livins easy. so imma make the best of it. who wants to go to the beach?
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[29 Jan 2006|08:53pm] |
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i wish i had a home to go back to.
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[25 Nov 2005|11:54am] |
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i dont love you anymore.
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| kdkdkdkdkdkdkd |
[05 Nov 2005|08:09pm] |
anxious.nomakeup.nothingtodomyhair.noclothes.nocar.nohome.nadawadatadaenmicada.shouldibe?
responsible?ithinknot.toomuch responsiblility killed the cat. toomuch waiting killedyo mama. getready for thismexitown. comingto theatres thisfriday.xo
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| when it rains it pours |
[01 Nov 2005|11:04pm] |
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my little house broke down. worst thing that could possibly happen. i think god is punishing me.
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| live in love |
[15 Oct 2005|10:31am] |
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last nite was crazy but fun. i was so happy seeing all my girls together again. we really need to just screw the boyfriend for at least one nite and have a girl nite. am i asking for too much? cmon girls u can leave the men at home for one nite to get stoney with meeee. so the living situation is getting better. im starting to feel happier. i just want to be able to hang up my clothes in a closet and not live out of a suit case. all in good time. thanks to la i had the best high last nite. i felt like i was in alice and wonderland. it waaassss crazy mang. silly rabbit tricks are for kids. p.s. im in love with the funky d.j. from last nite.hehe
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[24 Aug 2005|01:18pm] |
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its so sad to look back on my old entries and find that im still stuck in the same situation. every single time we fall into this pattern. im stuck in the past, too scared to move on. but at the same time i feel like i have tried to move on and start fresh but things just never seemed to work out. meh meh meh i miss my dad. im broke as a joke. tonite is stinky. someone save me. and someone find me a nice boy who wont call me to ask for money. la niggas rule the world. remember that.
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[02 Jul 2005|11:13am] |
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i wish i could rewind these past couple of days.
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[08 Apr 2005|07:36pm] |
i think im going to stay in costa rica
and live in this surfer town jaco
people here are gorgeous
i cant get enough of all the little shops in town
surf is great
and my snorkeling instructor is pretty sexy i must say
mas vodka por favor
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| so confused |
[13 Jan 2005|10:19am] |
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mood |
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im not really sure if i can take much of this. i really feel like im cutting myself short. i know that i deserve to be treated better. and i know that u are trying but i dunno i guess its just not good enough. i used to think i expectd too much from you but i dont think thats the problem. you can tell me you love me as much as you want. but those are just words. i cant feel it or see it so the only way i know is by ur actions. and lately your actions dont show me that you do. i just dont know what to do anymore.
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| survey |
[11 Jan 2005|09:20am] |
i n f o r m a t i o n
1. name: brianna lopez
2. single or taken: taken
3. sex: female
4. birthday: january 26 ( 15 more days )
5. siblings: 2 little sistas
6. hair color: black
7. eye color: honey brown
8. shoe size: 7
9. height: if im lucky 5'2"
f a s h i o n s t u f f
1. where is your favorite place to shop: hollister and victoria secret
2. any tattoos or piercings: ears and nose, no tattoos yet
s p e c i f i c s
1. do you do drugs?: sometimes
2. what kind of shampoo do you use?: suave?
3. what are you most scared of?: heights and spiders
4. who is the last person that called you?: my pops
5. Where do you want to get married?: on a cruise ship
6. what would you change about yourself?: skinnier and longer legs
f a v o r i t e s
1. color: red
2. food: penne pasta
3. boys names: blake
4. girls names: skyler
5. subjects in school: painting
6. animals: cats
h a v e y o u e v e r
1. given anyone a bath?: eh i dont think so
2. smoked?: yes
3. bungee jumped?: never ever
4. made yourself throw up?: nope
5. skinny dipped?: once
6: ever been in love?: si
7. made yourself cry to get out of trouble?: always
9. actually seen your crush naked?: hmm i wonder
10. cried when someone died?: yeah
11. lied: who hasnt
12. fallen for your best friend?: dont think so
13. been rejected?: me? psh
14. rejected someone?: yes
15. used someone?: what i do best
16. done something you regret?: plenty a time
c u r r e n t
clothes: pj pants and a jacket
music: van morrison
make-up: none but when do i ever
annoyance: being sick and not being able to breathe thru my nose
book you're reading: just finished the dirty girls social club
in cd player: van morrison
in dvd player: harry potter :)
color of toenails: orangish red
l a s t p e r s o n
you touched: stormie
hugged: russ
you im'ed: bean
you yelled at: sierra
you kissed: russ
a r e y o u
understanding: most of the time
open-minded: yess
arrogant: no
insecure: who isnt
interesting: uhhh to some maybe
random: sometimes
hungry: nope just got breakfast from anna's
smart: uhhh no
moody: yup
organized: couldnt be even if my life depended on it
shy: very
difficult: at times
attractive: shiiit u know i be fly
messy: ohhh boy messy doesnt even describe it
r a n d o m
In the morning I: do my hur, pick out some clothes then go to 0 prd.
love is: the distance between reality and pain
i dream about: you
o p p o s i t e s e x
what do you notice first: smile, eyes, shoes
last person you slow danced with: hugo
worst question to ask: is it me or do u look fat today?
who makes you laugh the most: kdizz and lard
who makes you smile? russ y mis amigos
who do you have a crush on: jude law
d o y o u e v e r
sit on the internet all night waiting for that someone special to im you?: ha no
wish you were a member of the opposite sex?: who doesnt want to be a man ( i know kim does fo sho )
wish you were younger: all the time things are so simple when ur younger
cry because someone said something about you?: welcome to my life
n u m b e r
of times i have had my heart broken: several but by the same person
of hearts i have broken: prob. none
of guys/girls you kissed: ha 2 many 2 count
of continents i have lived in: just one
of cds i own: not many
of scars on my body: only a few
f i n a l q u e s t i o n s
1. do you like fillings these out?: only when im really bored
2. gold or silver: silver
3. what was the last film you saw at the movies?: closer
7. favorite cartoon/anime?: sponge bob
8. what did you have for breakfast this morning?: blueberry bagel
10. who would you love being locked in a room with?: felix from one tree hill
11. could you live without your computer?: no way
12. would you color your hair?: it is at the moment
13. habla espanol? pequito
15. how many people are on your buddy list?: around 120
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[24 Dec 2004|11:22pm] |
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i wish you all a merry christmas <3
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[17 Dec 2004|09:42am] |
the only time i feel happy is when im sleeping
so will someone just wake me up once december ends
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[28 Nov 2004|06:46pm] |
if a guy makes me happy or says something to make me happy then im in sucha good mood. but if one little thing goes wrong its like i have bipolar and im instantly sad or grumpy. ever since i can remember iv been with boy after boy after boy. i rely my happiness on them. and of coarse most of you kno guys suuuckk ass. so most of the time i feel like hanging myself. there has to be some reason why i need one all the time. why cant i just not have a boy in my life. i dont get it. and of coarse i really want a boyfriend. and i even found someone that i actuallylike. but i feel like iv already fuckd things up. i make myself too available. im way to needy and jealous and retardeeeeedd. everything just seems to be going downhill. i blame everything on my parents. if they wouldnt have splittn up i would probably still be with russ. even tho he treatd me like shit i still had someone at the end of the nite. ehhhhhhh but i really am over him. i just need to be strong and not go back to him. if things dont go well with this new boy from now on its just me myself and i. fuck boys fuck you
sorry but i needed to get that out.
oh yeah and from now on im prude.
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[25 Nov 2004|04:27pm] |
today was rather depressing without my mom
but food was good
family was akward
n have a sore throat
buuut
im soo excited for 2mrw
i have a date!
happy thanksgiving
<3
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[09 Nov 2004|11:55am] |
i woke up today and was energetic and finally in a good mood
i was so stupid for every thinking that i was in love with you
now i just look at you and want to laugh
actually more like i want to slap yo face then laugh then ruuuunn away
im so stokd for decades next week
im in the dancing mood
i want to dress up as a crack whore from the 70s
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[02 Nov 2004|11:37am] |
i couldnt even look at you today
i wish i could just close my eyes
and you would be out of my life
and i could just forget everything that you have done to me
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